Steve Alessi: Author of Alessi’s Angle, Pastor of Metro Life Church in Miami, Husband of World Renown Worship Leader Mary Alessi and Father of Four. 
What will they come up with next? I'm talking book titles, or course. So Mary and I are watching the Today show the other day and they're interviewing the authors of a book titled, "Taming Your Alpha B_ _ _ h". How to be Fierce and Feminine (and Get Everything you Want). Did I say it was a book written by women for women? Watching the interview led by women, I was wondering if there were any men on the set and if so, how uncomfortable that shoot must have been.
At least that was my initial thought as a book with a title like this first made me think of the old, mean spirited feminine movement. But this is the ultimate example of you can't tell a book by it's cover...or at least it's title. Actually, the cover is quite classy with its beautiful pink high heel shoe. Even better is the content as authors Christy Whitman and Rebecca Grado have nailed it. Here's what you'll find on Amazon: "In many areas women have earned the equality we’ve been fighting for. We’ve broken through glass ceilings and achieved great success. We’ve shown that we can prosper by our own means. And we’ve become influential, respected leaders. Yet many of us find ourselves unhappy, anxious, overwhelmed. Where’s the pot of gold at the end of our “I can do it just like a man” rainbow?"
Honestly, I've been worried for my three daughters and their future as it seems like femininity has changed over the years, or at least it has for some in society that evidently have missed out on being a real woman. The women I'm surrounded by and work with everyday, and the ladies I've known all my life have never had to worry about their Alpha B_ _ _ _h, because they aren't one. Not that they're not fierce leaders in their own line of work, because each of them have accomplished great exploits and have done so while staying married and raising children, which shows you the fight they have on the inside of them. Yet it's their grace, sweet & gentle spirit with which they go about their work and lives that has allowed them to get what they want out of life.
I realize what I'm saying here will provoke some to cry foul and hate while claiming I'm a male chauvinist, but all I can say is the proof is seen in the women in my life. Has life been easy for them? Not at all, but to see how they dealt with the stuff that has come their way demonstrates a strength that comes from a place of beautiful grace and femininity. It's their Womanhood that makes them strong. All woman, all loving, all kind, all embracing and caring, and all able to handle life.
Less you think this is not true, I would invite you to check out a gathering of these courageous and beautiful women coming up this week. Over 600 of them will be gathering in South Florida from all over the US to celebrate their Womanity. One such woman is a Rabbi who left her homeland as a young girl and came to the United States to establish her life. Today she travels across the globe raising awareness and support for hospitals and orphanages in Israel. Another courageous beautiful woman has been able to fight through the challenges of the streets and drug addiction and today reaches into the inner city with a message of compassion and hope. She's also the mother of one of the NBA's brightest superstars. And another simply gorgeous woman is the one I get to sleep with every night. Talk about fierce...she stood there for over 40 minutes with great faith while I endured a Heart Attack a few years back, and while the paramedics hit me seven times with the pads just to keep me alive, she never gave up faith and prayed me through it all.
These women and many more like them each share some of the most inspiring lives as they've been able to tackle life head on with an inner strength that comes from the unique beings they were created to be. They're proud of their Womanity and embrace their femininity, not needing to compete with the men of society. They've encountered death, divorce, depression and heart-break, yet have remained strong in their skin of sweetness. The stuff they've had to endure will no doubt cause many of them to cry when they get together this week, but in and through their tears they'll find themselves even stronger.
I hope true femininity is making a comeback in our society, and evidently it is, as the numbers for the Womanity conference are climbing every day. It shows us that woman all over are looking for something more, after experiencing what society has tried to sell them. The future's looking up for my three little ladies!
True women of strength need to be honored and celebrated, so please share with me a story of the special ladies you have encountered in your life.
Okay so I hadn't commented on your blogs in a few weeks but couldn't go on with my day without doing so. Simply put, behind every well balanced and successful woman is usually an amazing man. In my case taming my inner Alpha B has taken years and will always be a work in progress. But I couldn't have done it without an amazing supportive husband who always brought me back to where God intended me to be...ultimately realizing that being a strong woman is a gift but is MOST powerful when exercised from a humble place.
My Life is ABSOLUTELY GREATER because of my Wife. Like my coffee; she is Strong and Sweet!! :-) It takes an amazing woman to raise the 4 boys we have together and I could not and would not do it with out her. She is definitely ALL GIRL and embraces her femininity but also uses her strengths everyday. She was raised all "90's" woman but has really found a balance and God has blessed her; and more so BLESSED ME...with her.
Shout out to my momma and my sisters too!! (Just in case they read this; that way they don't beat me up later...)
See ya,
Thank you Pastor for sticking up for femininity. I love being a woman but don't appreciate to plight others before have set in their search for equality with man. God had the perfect plan of help mates. That's what we are for eachother as sisters and for our husbands, children and family. My mom had to be both mom and dad for my brother and I. But never once did that require her to bash men or try to be one. She's always been a lady with grace and beauty and a fight in her that won't quit for her family.
Loving this whole topic of femininity! I’m so happy that God me with the XX chromosomes and didn’t sneak in the Y! I have loved being a woman since I found the freedom of being a girl :) That thought didn’t’ stem from the feminist movement and it certainly wasn’t found in the “I am woman hear me roar” mentality… it was discovered when my eyes were opened to why I was created. It was a little (BIG) thing I discovered called grace; which when exhibited by a woman, displays God’s splendor in creation.
I believe that’s why the Womanity Conference is coming at such a critical moment. God is going to pour into His women and remove the scales from their eyes to see that they were created with purpose.
So excited !!!
Having seen my Mother work three jobs at Christmas time just so she could buy me, my brother and sister what we wanted for Christmas. Having been married now for nearly 28 years to a woman that worked full time, finished her Bachelors degree in Business and had children all at the same time. Having watched my wife make the selfless decision to leave a job that she was being paid $175/hr so that she could raise our children and devote more time to ministry. And now I have the privilege of watching my daughter imitate my wife's work ethic, imitate her desire for excellence when it comes to Godly things and planning to use her hard earned Ivy League education to benefit those in need. How blessed I am that I have three generations of strong, God fearing, beautiful, wise and yet fully feminine women in my life. I can not say it any better than Proverbs:
She shall rejoice in time to come.
She opens her mouth with wisdom,
And on her tongue is the law of kindness.
She watches over the ways of her household,
And does not eat the bread of idleness.
Her children rise up and call her blessed;
Her husband also, and he praises her:
“Many daughters have done well,
But you excel them all.”
Charm is deceitful and beauty is passing,
But a woman who fears the Lord, she shall be praised.
Give her of the fruit of her hands,
And let her own works praise her in the gates.
Thanks Pastor for your wonderful words! I am a former Feminazi, I would write poem after poem, prose on prose about how to beat men at their own game; how evil they were and how we had to fight for everything we could get. I even pushed for the ERA and read Steinem and Friedan like I read the Bible now. Life tossed me around quite a lot and much of my depression and brokenness came from this mindset. Since I met Jesus 8 years ago I've been learning to embrace my femininity not as weakness but as the true strength that it is. The power of being a woman in Christ is incomparable and the strength we receive when we submit to the Lord is immeasurable. So, I cry at tv commercials and I love that when I greet friends we squeal in delight, jump up and down and hug. I love the freedom of knowing my place and my role rather than just flopping around trying to wear daddies clothes and walk in his shoes. I can't wear high heels anymore and that's sad cause I would totally rock them now!
Mory, You're one of those "special" women I get to work with daily. Thanks for the inspiration!!
Armando, Yes sir, your Ana is a strong and sensitive woman.. Then again, raising her 5 boys does bring out the best in her. Happy Birthday bud!
Aileen, It's a blessing to see your mother in you!
Ana, Seeing the women celebrate their Womanity over the next few days will be a highlight for so many. Keep being the Woman you are!!
David, Yes you are blessed to have 3 strong, God fearing, beautiful, wise yet full feminine women in your world. Keep lloviing them the way you do!!
Rosi, You have a pretty amazing story to tell. So many others need to hear this!! Thanks for sharing.
Wow! What a great blog about women, thanks Pastor Steve for honoring us! As for me, the special women that I've encountered in my life range from wonderful ladies from my past and present. Two of those powerful ladies are my grandmothers, one "the help" the other a teacher. When they were living they taught me that I can do all things through Christ, despite the color of my skin. Then there's my mom, sweet, classy, and full of love. Our expressions of the same traits are so different, and because of that she's taught me about the varied facets of a woman that we all wear differently. This is what makes us so unique and wonderfully made. Then there's women that the Lord handpicked for my life, outside of my bloodline. Women like Pastor Mary, that set such a Godly example as a leader in life. This is a beautiful exchange as other wonderful women can learn from her and each other. This is when the amazing continuum of Womanity transpires. It sprouts out from the roots of great women that have grounded us in who we are, daughters of the King. These roots grow so that I can then grow and be a women that little ladies can look up to, and learn from. It's a beautiful thing, called Womanity that I'm so proud to be a part of from root to budding stem. Knowing who I am in the Lord allows me to put Him first, and eliminates the need to hide behind anything else. I know that the Lord loves us women, because He's blessed us with each other so that we can build bonds that are unparalleled.
This Blog touched my heart and stirred up some tears! Remembering everything that I've gone thru & fought through in life as a woman. Working as a Project Manager in Construction it was always evident that it will always be a Man's world, so I had to find my place without trying to prove I'M better than you because I'm a woman. Daily I searched, seek and still strive in understanding what kind of a woman God wants me to be? and...It sure isn't being a FEMINIST ( I have to thank my grandma for those lessons of femininity she gave me, who to be in Life and in my Husbands life). Unfortunately, I know many women that are all about "I DONT NEED A MAN I CAN DO IT ALL BY MYSELF"(with their hand on their hip). But those of us that know who God is, who make every effort to understand God and what HE intended when He created Man and Women; well we know better (I Hope). I love Proverbs 31:10 and on, it allows me to see that even back in Noemi/Esther/Vashti & Ruth's era proves women can be a wife, mother, manager, leader, even entrepreneur and yet be virtuous, industrious, domesticated, generous, strong, honorable, wise and godly. That reads WOMANITY
Hello My name is Aisha ...I am a Woman and I praise God for my femininity.
It is so true..what women and men are portrayed or perceived to be in the 20th century can be brutal and scary. What a blessing it is to know and trust that a decision can be made to stay true to God's word and purpose. I am looking forward to Womanity and all that it has to offer
Thank you, Pastor Steve, I really enjoyed this blog. I myself used to be a feminazi! However, I have to trust that God knew what he was doing when he created Adam and Eve. Eve was created so that Adam would not be alone. Eve was to gentle, sensitive, a wife, a mother. Yet, I have met women who are insensitive and quite the bully.
I was married young to an insensitive abusive man who changed my whole outlook on men and I became "I am a strong woman and I don't need a man". But then I met and married a true and wonderful man, my husband now, and I love being a sensitive and affectionate wife to my husband and a mother to my children. I am a wife, a mother, a homemaker, a chef, a manager, a cleaning lady, a teacher, a laundry maid, a role model, and a decision maker all in one. Over these past years, I have learned what it is to be feminine and I love it!
Nice one Pastor!
As a son, it not only encourages me to know my mom has people to count on and look up to, it gives me an oppurtunity to embrace the woman she is. She's a praying mom, a fearless mom, a tough and passionate mom at times, but overall, a God-Fearing mom. She plays a large part in who I am today as a young man of God, as she's always reminded me of where she was at compared to where she is today and how much she's trusted God to get there.
As a brother to a very feminine and yet very gifted sister, it brings me a great joy to know that there are people who care enough to be an example for her and lift her up as she toughs out the world and all it has to offer.
Finally,As a single guy, this gives me a lot of hope and also encourages me knowing that there are still girls out there fighting for holy, virtuous, and true femininity (makes the call for leadership to be much higher... and maybe the choosing process to be a bit easier! Haha!)
I hope everyone meets these great ladies in my life- not to mention my praying, prophetic Grandma on my dad's side, who always reminded me of who I was and my faithful and enduring Grandma on the other side who stood by her husband in spite of all the hardship. I have a proud lineage of great, God-fearing women- which has always raised the bar in helping me realize what it is to be a God-fearing leader in my home, and in what I pray for in a wife- a woman in pursuit of God in Godly strength, beauty, and grace!
Pastor, this is a GREAT blog!! I love it! There are many women in my life that amaze me and inspire me but none more than my own mother. I know most of us can say this about our moms but I can tell you that my mother has gone through so many 'cliche' trials of life from having an unfaithful husband to living with a drug addict. And although she has cleaned houses for most of her life, her faith, humility and perseverance have helped her accomplish financial goals that would seem impossible to others. She is one of the handful of women I go to for advice and council. She's not perfect but she never ceases to amaze me! She is an overcomer without ever having to try to prove to be as good as a man. She's all woman :)
Thank you for sharing this!!
It all began at home. My mother made sure that she instilled within me the right values, Godly-values at that. She taught, not so much with words but by example. I saw how she took care of our home, of my father and I. She devoted most of her life to us. She made sure that I had a godly foundation. In doing so, she was assured that when it's time for me to leave home, the foundation I had & the values she's instilled within me will keep me on the right track.
I thank God for my mother...
Jescel, You are so blessed to have such a Godly example in your mom. Thanks for sharing.
Cory, Keep walking in the shadow of your mother's life. True strength!
Rachel, Keep fighting, girl, God has blessed you with a good man!!
Ari, Your mother is an inspiration to your entire family...and of course, us here at Metro.
Pastor, I totally loved this blog. I'm especially intrigued by the topic. I come from a family of amazing, godly women, who inspite of the blows that life dealt them, and disappointment in the men in their lives, didn't cave under the pressure of their circumstances, but instead, stood firm and with courage, confidence and humility, raised godly seed, kept their families together and maintained godly womanity. So thankful for the example that they are and for my godly heritage.